The Ipex: “The World’s Most Advanced Bra” as told to PatboyX

Girding the mammary glands is at times an uncomfortable,
and often daunting task. I, finding my unmentionables in poor shape, decided I
would try Victoria’s Secret’s new item, the imposingly named “Ipex” brassiere.
There are many aspects of bra shopping to take into account. Let’s set up the
criteria and weigh the Ipex against them. 

1)     
Comfort: Breasts are a bouncy part of anatomy and call for support.  The
Ipex provides superior support to keep your boobies in place.  Another aspect of
comfort that must be considered is the all-day wearability.  After having worn
the Ipex for a few full days now, I will confidently say this bra, with its wide
straps and soft lining, will have you wondering occasionally if you forgot to
put on a bra before leaving that morning.  A for comfort.

2)     
Appearance:  The Ipex touts two years of technological development.  So
what exactly took them two years to develop (about the same time it takes a
pubescent girl to develop breasts mind you—so now they have a whole new
demographic)?  It is the lining.  Yes, ladies, rejoice, the Ipex has a feathered
lining that provides full coverage so that you have no embarrassing moments when
it becomes chilly in a room or you become aroused, and tapers off at the edges
to provide a lightness that was previously only seen in unlined bras. The
tapered edges provide a seamlessness that keeps the space between bra and breast
to a minimum allowing this bra to look fine even in your sluttiest of clothing.

3)     
Price:  While Victoria’s Secret’s merchandise always is in a price range
that might confound a wal-mart lingerie budget, I do find paying more to be
worth it for these items.  Every bra I’ve owned from Victoria’s Secret has
lasted more than a year, where your average may have underwire poking through
within months.  The Ipex costs only $10 more than the run of the mill Victoria’s
Secret bra, and for the other benefits, I find this $10 to be highly worth it.

For comfort, appearance and quality, I recommend Victoria’s
Secret’s Ipex to those of you with fatty deposits on your chests.

6 out of six cups. (Famous cups! Try and guess what famous
bewebies these are!)