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: EEEyElVEkVNrqePKYJ
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May 15 2005 -- Man-meat.
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Mongol General: Conan, what is best in life?
Conan: To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women!
Unfortunately for us men getting your enemies crushed and driven before you is mostly illegal and hearing the lamentation of the women is pretty much not going to happen, so instead what do we men have to keep up feeling manly? Not much, especially with the way pink clothes are being forced on us and this whole nonsense of women’s suffrage and liberation. So what are we to do? To answer that question I took a stroll in the food store (men shopping for food, even more feminization of the man!) and tried to find something to make me feel good again. Now while I did not find paradise I did find some meat, and until meat is made illegal it is one of the things us men can enjoy while doing manly things, like working on the car, motorcycle shopping, and listening to manly music like Collective Soul.
Amour Hickory Smoked Steakhouse Tenders. Bagged and flavorful it provides us men something to chew on and today we get to have a guest reviewer of 78west poll fame, Ryan. Oh wait, he refused to speak about his experiences with this beef jerky, so forget him It was a cold rainy day when we tried out this jerky. We had just returned from manly motorcycle shopping and now were sitting around like men discussing manly things like women and beer. What made it even more manly was that it was in my bedroom in my parents house. That’s right, real men like their parents and aren’t afraid to admit it, go tell an Italian that he is a wuss for hanging out with his parents, I dare you. They’ll smack you around and tell you to show some respect.
But enough of that, lets get down to the meat of this review (ha ha, I made a funny).
 Coming in a bunch of little pieces the meat was tough and took some effort to eat, which is something you would want in a jerky. For me the initial taste was something like bologna, which I found to be a bit strange, but that quickly faded. The jerky took a while to chew through and defiantly took some effort to eat, not something for the weak womanly types out there.
"But Mr. Message Whore man, women can enjoy jerky too!!"
While I suppose that is true, the ones I know would not be able to appreciate it in the same way. All this effort just to eat a little bit of meat? No ma’am, I don’t think you would enjoy it in the same way us men do. They should stick with being in the kitchen and baking us men pies and having our manly babies.
Overall I think it’s a pretty good food and doesn’t taste too bad. If you are in the mood for some tough meat and this is all you can find then I’d say go for it. There are better jerky’s out there but this one gets the job done. Ryan said it tasted like bologna. Interesting.
(Now I have to go apologize to all of the women I offended in this review. Sorry all. I sure stink at being a manly man)
Posted by LordJezo
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