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: EEkuklplupFAkJObcd
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August 17 2005 -- Slow.
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This review is not going to even have a picture so if that is what you come for I suggest you turn away now. Why wont it have a picture? Little old me figured that the beverage I was buying would be prominently featured on the home page of the establishment I was going to, it’s all over the stores and the windows so of course it should be on the site. I told you there was no picture in this review, so that means there was no picture on the site. Actually, this whole review is going to stink because once again I am so apathetic to the product, it's hard to get excited and write lots of fun things about something that stinks.
Instead of a nice colorful picture to get you in the mood to try one out we are going to have theater of the mind!
(insert picture of Turtle Nut Chocolate Iced Coffee from Dunkin’ Dounuts here)
There is it. Just close your eyes and imagine a large dark object in your hand. It has a cylinder shape. It feels cold in your hand, wet with moisture. You bring it closer to your mouth and wrap your lips around the opening. You suck in, hoping to get the liquid inside. Some might spill out and dribble down your chin, but you wont let that stop you, you take as much into your mouth as you can, swallowing it all down.
Too bad that was actually better then the drink was.
What is a turtle nut? No idea. I figured it was some kind of nut and was excited to have some in my drink. Problem was there weren’t even any nuts. Heck, there wasn’t even any flavor in this thing. It tasted like cold coffee and a lump of chocolate at the bottom. Oh the joys.
So there I was, early in the morning (it was about 10:30) on a Sunday. I had driven across the grand state of New Jersey in order to get to a woman who would in turn take me on a magical Japanese journey into sight, sound, and taste. We were going to Mitsuwa and there was nothing anyone could do to stop us. Maybe no one else could stop up but my body needed caffeine and I figured a big old thing like this Turtle Nut jobber would be able to provide it. Provide it, it did, but provide me with flavor and an agreeable drinking experience? No, none of that. It tasted bland, the chocolate wasn’t mixed in evenly, and I felt used. Maybe I shouldn’t have jumped into it blindly with a large and maybe should have tested the waters with a small. That wouldn’t have been extreme and I would have felt like less of a man. I needed to make up for my short comings in other areas so the only option I could even consider would be large one.
Oh well. Bunch of wasted money. I’ll stick with Starbucks next time.
1 cheese.
Don’t bother. Mitsuwa was good, as always though. If you ever want Japanese food and are in the area it’s the best supermarket to go to.
Posted by LordJezo
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